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On November 30th, a well-known author in the small town of Salida, Colorado passed away. His name was Kent Haruf, famous for well-known books such as Benediction, Plainsong, and The Tie that Binds. You may not know him but I did because I was one of his nephews. 

Growing up, I  never had a father, so uncles and grandfathers were more father than he was. I loved him like a father, not because of money or anything like that, because he was there for me. He was there for me like any father would be for their child. Several years ago, I lost my grandfather to both a stroke and diabetes. When he died, Kent was there for me if I needed that shoulder to cry on, to talk to, anything because he was there for me. 

A few years ago, he developed a virus in his small intestine. Right there, I was afraid to let him go, I would never have the chance to see him again. He recovered from it, but he was so frail, I wish I could help him but couldn't.

I got to see him one last time last summer. What he did is he took me up the mountain where you can get a large view of everything in Salida. The last day before I left to go back to Iowa, he took me to a diner because I told him I wanted to be a writer just like him. I forget what he said to me, but I told him what I wanted to do and he said I might have something worthy of a novel.

I was making breakfest when I got the phone call from my grandmother saying he passed away. She told me a story about Kent and his wife's last conversation. He looked at her and said he was ready to go. She said to go ahead, and that's what he did. He went back to bed and closed his eyes for the last time, and died peacefully in his sleep. I knew he wasn't going to last long, but I wasn't ready to let him go.

I'm having a tough time trying to write all this and keep myself from crying. Everyone grives in their own way, but the connection he and I had...I've tried to hard to cry when I got the phone call, but nothing.

I hope somewhere in Heaven, he's free and happy, going about with no pain and being company with my grandfather.

His funeral was held Sunday, just a few days ago. I wished I was there to say what I wanted to say, but I knew I was there in spirit. I'll miss him so much.

Rest in Peace, Kent Haruf (1943-2014). 

Uncle, Husband, Father, Friend
On November 30th, a well-known author in the small town of Salida, Colorado passed away. His name was Kent Haruf, famous for well-known books such as Benediction, Plainsong, and The Tie that Binds. You may not know him but I did because I was one of his nephews. 

Growing up, I  never had a father, so uncles and grandfathers were more father than he was. I loved him like a father, not because of money or anything like that, because he was there for me. He was there for me like any father would be for their child. Several years ago, I lost my grandfather to both a stroke and diabetes. When he died, Kent was there for me if I needed that shoulder to cry on, to talk to, anything because he was there for me. 

A few years ago, he developed a virus in his small intestine. Right there, I was afraid to let him go, I would never have the chance to see him again. He recovered from it, but he was so frail, I wish I could help him but couldn't.

I got to see him one last time last summer. What he did is he took me up the mountain where you can get a large view of everything in Salida. The last day before I left to go back to Iowa, he took me to a diner because I told him I wanted to be a writer just like him. I forget what he said to me, but I told him what I wanted to do and he said I might have something worthy of a novel.

I was making breakfest when I got the phone call from my grandmother saying he passed away. She told me a story about Kent and his wife's last conversation. He looked at her and said he was ready to go. She said to go ahead, and that's what he did. He went back to bed and closed his eyes for the last time, and died peacefully in his sleep. I knew he wasn't going to last long, but I wasn't ready to let him go.

I'm having a tough time trying to write all this and keep myself from crying. Everyone grives in their own way, but the connection he and I had...I've tried to hard to cry when I got the phone call, but nothing.

I hope somewhere in Heaven, he's free and happy, going about with no pain and being company with my grandfather.

His funeral was held Sunday, just a few days ago. I wished I was there to say what I wanted to say, but I knew I was there in spirit. I'll miss him so much.

Rest in Peace, Kent Haruf (1943-2014). 

Uncle, Husband, Father, Friend

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Hi-Harri
Harrison Carmack
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United States Minor Outlying Islands
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:iconvioletzen:
VioletZen Featured By Owner Dec 11, 2014   General Artist
Thanks for the fav :)
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:iconpeter-the-tomato:
Peter-the-Tomato Featured By Owner Dec 10, 2014
Thanks for faving :)
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spaceyspaceybrianmay Featured By Owner Sep 16, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
thanks for the fav
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AllyCatBlu Featured By Owner Aug 20, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
thanks for the fav
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CartoonWatch Featured By Owner Jul 24, 2014  Professional Traditional Artist
thx for the fave
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:iconfannychichou:
fannychichou Featured By Owner Jul 10, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thanks for the fav!!
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:iconinsouciancee:
Insouciancee Featured By Owner Jun 20, 2014
Boo...
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:iconhi-harri:
Hi-Harri Featured By Owner Jun 20, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Hello, Penny.


I need a moment because I don't know what to say.

The last 24 hours have been horrible for me and life.

Last night, my mother had a reaction to the medication she was taking. She couldn't say or do anything but yell for me to call 911. I was scared, the woman that has taken care of me for the last 18 years was in pain and I couldn't do anything more to help. 

As the ambulance came and left to take her to the hospital, my grandmother had to get dressed and go to find out what was wrong. I was just about to go to bed but decided to peek if I had any mail from dA: Only one, you. It was a Feedback message where I thought it was someone saying thanks for liking my picture. But no, it was you.

I didn't know what to do. All the shit that had happened stopped when I read your name. I didn't know if I was dreaming or not, and I wanted to talk you so bad, but didn't know what to say. The last time we talked, I tried to make you mine, and look what that did.

You have no idea how bad I wanted to click reply and talk to you again, but I didn't know what to say. I looked at myself for a moment and knew I have to talk to you again, but needed to figure out what to say first, and that's what I did.

I haven't slept ever since last night, my mom in pain and I couldn't do anything. Then you came back into my life. I literately forgot about you. After I sent that message on my birthday, that was the last time I remembered you. I came home, went to dA to see if you said something...no, and that's ok. I was an asshole and you really didn't need say anything else. It's my fault I saw you more than you were and I wish I had never done that.

After my birthday and I forgot about you, time and life went on. I still looked for a job, nothing. I went to school everyday so I could graduate, and did, but I won't be getting my diploma anytime soon. Turns out I failed my math classes. The school was nice enough to let me graduate like everyone else, but I won't be getting my diploma until I make up the math. It's funny how you plan everything out but reality checks its ugly face in everyday...ha-ha-ha...

My mother has also had trouble finding a job. She quit for some reason, don't know why, but yet she looks for jobs everyday but could never find one. Because of that, we had to move because we had no money to stay in Dallas since the apartment we were living in was an arm and a leg, so we moved back into Iowa with my brother and grandmother until we can find a place for us.

I am still looking for a job. I put in applications a week ago, haven't heard anything. I'll call in a few days to see if they ever got my application, they did, but haven't gone though it yet. So here I am, looking to something I don't know will happen.

For the last few weeks, I've been working as a writer. I figured if I can't draw, I'll use my creative talents to the world of books. My uncle, who is a well-known writer, said that it would be great for me to write, seeing my talent used for something great. I still wish to be a singer or an actor, but I can only do one at a time.

If you've had it though my small life story, please reply something cute. If not, it's ok.


I'm not asking you to feel sorry for me in anyway, I just thought I'd let you know what has happened since we stopped talking.

I really did and still do miss you, Penny. I'm sorry for everything I did wrong.

I do believe it's the afternoon where you are. I don't know when you'll get this, but if you want to talk, note me, email me, anything if you want.

I wish you the best in life and the future.

Goodbye.

-Harrison
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:iconinsouciancee:
Insouciancee Featured By Owner Jun 21, 2014
Hello Harrison,

I'm so sorry to hear the news about your mother.

I truly hope she is feeling better and is receiving the proper care in hospital.

And, congratulations on graduating from high school.

It would seem I couldn't have chosen a better time to drop by your profile and boo you.

But I don't want you to read anything into it as that's just me being me.

I haven't forgotten what it is you wrote to me in your last post or of the fact I gave you a chance to prove how much you really cared for me, which obviously proved to be too much trouble for you.

You didn't prove anything to me, though, as I already knew you were only interested in me sexually which you confirmed in your last post to me, which I was obliged to hide from public view for reasons of discretion.

I don't think you realise as to how fortunate you were to have been able to have conversed with me privately as I never converse with anyone privately on the Internet as a rule.

There are two reasons why I don't converse with people privately I encounter on the Internet:

1: Most people are too unsophisticated for me

2: Most people find sweet, kind and adorable me too irresistible, so much so, they become obsessed with me, which isn't a lot of fun to have to constantly deal with all the time.

That's the reason I ended up spending so much time playing with the psychopaths at TDSF because I didn't have to worry about them becoming romantically obsessed with me.

Of course, it was not my original intentions when joining TDSF to play psyche games with psychopaths as I all had sought was some meaningless witty and clever banter.

I was thinking about posting the following Victoria's Secret video clip in an exchange I'm currently engaged in with Wufpacker on his profile because just like these Victoria's Secret models I can't sing either, however, just like them I know how to pounce around like an idiot lip syncing to some song:

www.youtube.com/watch?v=j_EnTC…

The only two models better looking than me are Adriana and Doutzen in this video.  

The reason I was thinking about using this clip in my exchange with Wufpacker is because there is a subliminal connotation contained within the title of the song and how it ends with Candice Swanepoel now dressed to kill wearing her angle wings and walking down the stairs.

When you factor in I am more intelligent than all these models combined it is not too difficult to imagine as to what it can be like to encounter me in real life especially when I switch on all the hotgirl stuff.

That's what I hide as much as I can on the Internet.

But try as I might to keep everything abstract when it comes to me on the Internet I am ultimately governed by my own reality.

When you and I first met you couldn't string two words together with me.

It remained that way with you for months until you found your confidence with me, which I partially encouraged because you were so profoundly insular when I met you.  

When I first came here to DeviantArt I found myself immersed in a troll war where it was me against 20 or 30 of them.

It was the funniest goddamn thing I've ever encountered on the Internet.

But after six weeks I had the ring leaders suspended for a month by dA Admin even though it was the funniest thing I'd ever encountered on the Internet.

It was the same kinda dynamics with the psychopaths at TDSF which is exactly the dynamics portrayed in that Victoria's Secret video clip insofar everything leads to an ultimate end with me which has me using my prowess as a woman.

I got you to come out of your shell.

The consequence of which has been I've had to endure all your tortured sexual logic regarding me.

That Victoria's Secret video is 2:53 minutes long.

The hotgirl stuff totals :03 seconds in its entirety which is way less than 1% of the duration of the video, which is a perfect fit with reality insofar as its appropriation of time.

I have no intentions of educating you how to treat a woman like me.

In that regard, you are just another misfit like everybody else I've encountered who gets fixated with the less than 1%.

But I always leave myself open to be impressed by people regardless of my past encounters with that person or persons because I appreciate most people are operating to standards set by other women they've encountered.

I'm not other women.

Impress me.
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:iconhi-harri:
Hi-Harri Featured By Owner Jun 21, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Thank you for kind words about my mom and me graduating.

I have no way on impressing you with the events in my life, instead, I wrote about it. I read "Impress me", and seeing as I want to impress you, I can't since my life hasn't been all impressing. So I did what I thought would be impressive; I wrote you an impressive scene from one of my movie scripts.

It's my first time trying something like that, so I figured I'd send you a rough copy and see what would be needed to be improved on.

The girls in the beginning of the video look nice. For some reason, I can't see them in a bra, panties, and wings. I think ever since I "met" you and talked to you, I haven't seen woman attractive in that. I mean in the bedroom, yes, but not like that on a stage with cameras and music going off. Ever since I talked to you, I have seen the female form as more than just something to gawk at. I see women that are powerful, that they can strut their stuff and not give a fuck what people think of them.

But here I am, just a voice of a man. I think women don't care about what men think, just as long as they can get their point across. I hope I'm not offending in anyway, I've just giving up with men in general because of the trust relationship I never had with my father. I can't read a man or a woman, I'm only here to give advice and keep my nose out of people's business.

I hope my story impresses you. I was going to send it to you via note, but the note system doesn't have a documents function. Instead, I sent it to your e-mail.

I really do hope it impresses you. If not, please leave feedback on what was right and what was wrong.

It's 4 o'clock where I am. I think you're just waking up or going to bed. Either way, good night or good morning, sleep well or did you sleep well?

I'll be here...waiting...again...ok bye
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